Like memories of porno and tear stains and tobacco

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I wish I had the guts to post pictures of me crying on Facebook or everywhere. Facebook is basically everywhere, it finds me in the darkest corners of my being. I wish I didn’t know why I hurt so much sometimes. I wish I did not know my pattern so well and then just embrace it, layering wound upon wound, broken flesh on even more broken open sore flesh. Last night I came into my room and put CocoRosie on, closed my eyes and cried. They all look the same, they all feel the same. Alcohol does not help. Raluca, dearest bully of them all – always there in case you fall. Go to sleep or watch your pathetic, mind numbing TV shows, over and over again, slowly dying, surely renouncing the remote possibility of crystalline pure happiness. Whatever that means. After all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yy6X24zW2L8

pictures taken by Anna Godzina in May 2013